A Bruneiyuki’s Emotional Baggage!

               It’s been a while since the last time i encoded an entry in this blog clearly because i have a lot of things to do and finish in school. Really, graduate school is so taxing and entails a lot of hardwork, focus and dedication.Besides reading "tons" of readings, left and right individual and group reports and seminar presentation add to the challenge of graduate student life. Plus, more research, research and research. In fact, for the past two weeks, literally i’m chained to my laptap finishing reports on my two major subjects - structuralism in media theory and a seminar presentation on utilization of educational manipulatives in my elective subject EDTECH 201. Fortunately, the presentation did well and i’m so happy and relieved. and as a treat to myself, i alloted one whole weekend doing nothing but watch movies, go mall strolling and sing ala-concert king in the magic sing. 

On the other hand, besides meeting tight deadlines in school, to support my finances, i’m writing scripts as raket and I also teach partt-time at ACFL (

Asian

Center

for Foreign Languages). It’s been two months now I’m teaching foreigners speak Tagalog and it is really fun. The feeling? Its like you’re being transferred to a different world where you talk to foreigners in english whie teaching them Tagalog. You really have to practice both English and Filipino especially in addressing student’s inquiry on english word translation to Filipino. Also  for the past weeks, my number of students doubled. Aside from teaching in Ortigas, i also service an expat family in

Makati

. And honestly, they are really accomodating and comfortable to be with. I don’t just get to share our culture and language with them but also, the joy and fulfillment of establishing a connection among them as my  students and friends. In fact, for the past days, they’ve been telling me stories of their experiences here in the

Philippines

especially adjusting to the "erratic" climate we have. And speaking of the "erratic" behaviour of the weather, one of my student was absent in one of our meetings. But beyond that, the challenging part of the job is making activities, drills and even examinations to gauge every student’s development in class. So i’m not just obliged to guide them answer all the activity books, make discussions, but more importantly, assure that they are learning to write and speak in Filipino. In that part, asking them to have simple conversation with Filipinos is the best way to build their confidence in using the language. Beyond that, Now i have realized teaching is like performing. In order for you not to bore your students to death, you don’t just have to explain and make discussions in a traditional way, but should also animate yourself, perform with your highest energy and make interactive activities each student can actively participate. Fortunately, i was able to sustain that approach up to now. I’m just thankful God has given a lot of energy and patience!

As the first semester rushes to its end, obviously, the down pour of final papers and reports is tremendously escallating to "unprecedented" heights. In fact, after finishing a tedious week, here’s another week to "make love" with the library! Of course, the easy and accessible internet has all the information i need however, i’m still loking at the credibility of the source of information and so i still pratice and maintain traditional research in the library. Honestly, seeing piles of books makes me inspired to study and do my best. And also, there’s this feeling of comfort whenever im in the library. Its like home for me. And goind back to my upcoming sleepless nights, to uplift my spirit and give the best i can be, i promised to treat myself after this semester - something that is relaxing and truly unforgettable.  watching a cool flick, going to ace water spa, plunging into a beach adventure even though summer is way way over, or even having dinner with friends and videoke sessions are just some options i’m looking at to treat myself. OH i forgot, since the christmas season is already fast approaching, going to divisoria, 168 or tiendesitas could be a great option to add in my "treat-my-self-list" or stress-busting activity.

However there’s one thing that will truly change my whole life that i want to share with all of you. Last saturday, i received an email from an ad agency (from

Brunei

) i had applied before the semester started. And fortunately, they are already asking for my immediate response if i want to be employed in their company. In fact, they have already given me a contract wherein everything is already clearly stated - salary, housing, company car, medical benefits, etc. They are offering me a position as a copywriter. Actually, i was already interviewed last april at Dusit Hotel where the manager and some of his assistants stayed. Its just that i’m surprised its been long since the time they got me interviewed. Then i found out, i was shortlisted during the interview and now they are considering me to be employed in their company. Truly, God’s hands work in miraculous ways. Maybe its just destined for me. I don’t know. If ever ill say yes to this offer, i would working with them for two years and if they like my performance, i will be extended. The catch, i have already agreed to work with them!

Now, the consequences. There’s a lot of consequences in saying "i do" to them. as my first move, i have already informed ACFL, the school i’m currently teaching part-time, that i will no longer be accepting students and i’ll just finish the remaining sessions. Though my declaration is not yet official, giving them a hint of possible resignation is kinda a sign of courtesy. of course i’m still planning to forward a resignation letter. and goind back to the consequences i have to face, well, since i’m currently enrolled in my graduate degree, i told the ad agency that i hope they would give me til october to finish the semester and file all the papers needed for LOA. Plus, i also told them that i need to inform my present employer (ACFL) with my situation.

My feelings are mixed for so many reasons. I’m happy but kinda afraid. I’m very ecstatic because just like my friend told me, this job offer is a big break for me. In my opinion, i’ve always love to work in an advertising agency especially now that i have experiences in scriptwriting for television . And also, i always want to unleash my creatvity in making a "copy" that is not only crafted to sell, but can be a form of an art or expression of my individuality. And this is the main reason why, without  batting an eyelash, after reading the contract several times and asking my father to check it, i immediately agreed on the contract.

My family is supportive with whatever decision i will make. In fact, they are more ecstatic than i am after receiving that email. WE see it not only as a blessing from God but above all, a unique experience that i can use all of my skills and make a promising career in the future. As they say, oppurtunities knock only once, so grab it. same with, strike while the iron is hot. Now, the feeling of leaving our country is daunting on me.

Right now, i’m overwhelmed with what is happening and what can possibly happen. One big adjustment i have to make is basically leave all my loved ones and friends as i complete the two-year work contract abroad. Of course i’m a little bit sad because of the thought living far from your family but the experience of losing someone like my mom did not only make me strong, but make me mature and independent in facing life’s challenges. With that, i know i can endure the obstacles and loneliness abroad. But of course, the way im seeing it, i will be totally adjusting in the first months, but after meeting my co-workers who are mostly filipinos and enjoying the culture, language and places of

Brunei

, i believe, i can get over the sadness. Focus and dedication are also instruments for me to survive in a foreign land. And above all, God will be with me as i travel the road of humility and happiness.

Another thing that i’m thinking is that i have to leave UP. i have to file an LOA considering that the head of the graduate school of the

College

of

Mass Communication

is prodding me teach in UP CMC. as for me, though teaching production classes and popular is one of my dreams, i think, i’m not yet "ripe" to do such thing because i’m still lack the knowledge and experience to do so. Three years of production work is not enough and is limited to television production. and with this venture of mine in the advertising world ( two years or more), after this, i  think i would be very confident to teach and stir the passion of my future students. And hopefully, if God will permit and if its not too much to aks, i would want to also have a scholarship abroad - either acting, directing or scriptwriting. But for now, I’ll take everything one at a time.

With all of these changes, shifts and transitions in my life, i have nothing to regret. After the months of depression (before the start of the semester) God is again directing me in another direction where I can broaden my horizon, share my talent and fulfill an unselfish dream. As I enter into another world, I know God will be by my side to give me strength, more love and focus. I cannot ask for more. So be it!